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Sergey Zagraevsky

 

My XX century

Introduction

Chapter 1. “Soviet burgers”

Chapter 2. Vorkuta

Chapter 3. Sixties

Chapter 4: “Stagnation”

Chapter 5. Psychoanalysis

Chapter 6. Lenin, Party, Komsomol

Chapter 7. “Scientific career”

Chapter 8. Euphoria of epochs changing

Chapter 9. Arkady

Chapter 10. Commerce

Chapter 11. The loss of the bank

Chapter 12. Christianity

Illustrations

  

 

Published in Russian: Çàãðàåâñêèé Ñ.Â. Ìîé ÕÕ âåê. Ì.: Àëåâ-Â, 2001. ISBN 5-94025-009-2

 

 

Chapter 6. Lenin, Party, Komsomol

 

Attention!

The following text was translated from the Russian original by the computer program

and has not yet been edited.

So it can be used only for general introduction.

   RUSSIAN VERSION

 

 

I thought elephants and the odd and odd,

And yet I did not sleep.

And there was me, my hell,

And sat astride a chair.

 

And the devil said to me: " Well, old fellow?

Well, what we decided?

Sign the Union, and Aida in the stirrups,

And erred a bit?

 

And you can lie, and you can wander,

And friends to bring the herd!

And what will then pay -

So it's, you must understand, then!

 

But you know how sweet the sin

This sometimes bitter gray hairs.

And that happiness is not that one for all,

And that all - as one!

 

And you realize that no court above you,

No curse of the past years,

As with all you say “Yes”!

And along with all the “no”!

 

And you will be wolves in the land produce,

And teach them to wag my tail!

And what will then pay,

So it's, you must understand, then!

 

And that soul - last year's snow!

And look - and will carry it!

In our atomic age, in our stone age

At the price of conscience - snout!

 

And who needs it, it is “good”,

If all the road - in the ashes...

So come on, take it, old man, pen,

And here sign in the corner!

 

Then the devil touched the little finger nail,

And pulled me a bottle.

And I asked him: is blood?

-Ink, " he said.

 

                                       Alexander Galich

  

I

 

It is considered that the concept of “business” in our country appeared only in the post-perestroika times, and before that it seems to be and was not.

Actually it is just as wrong as the famous phrase: “In the Soviet Union no sex.” Was the sex was and business. And if on the availability of sex in the USSR (or rather, a normal sexual relations) has no doubts about the business should talk seriously.

My first thought on this subject comes: Yes, business was, but this concept in the Soviet times were only so-called “tsehoviki”trade “left” products. Or “speculators”, resold all but the deficit.

Actually the situation is much deeper.

We have already said that the economy of the USSR was in fact one giant centralized Corporation to which the far-Boeing” or “McDonalds”. In the property of this Corporation under the name of “Soviet socialist state” were all factories, farms and so on. All of this somehow worked and even once developed, although slowly and with a clear bias towards the military industry.

Who are all these multi-level system to manage? Right, the apparatchiks, nomenclature business executives and other similar Lord, earning this money, and cars, and villas, and personal pensions, and most importantly - power.

Now tell me where the fundamental difference between the goals and objectives of the “nomenklatura” from the standard Western businessman?

Put aside ideological husk and understand: “radical” differences and there was not. Money, money, money. And last able to take the form and benefits, and privileges, and country houses, and cars, and finally lead to the most important - the authorities. And more power - more money. That being closed circle.

And not accidentally the vast majority of party apparatchiks instantly “rebuild” and feel great new Russian economic conditions. Yes, many former “capitalists” and “speculators” have gained real political power.

Those and others - according to Western notions of businessmen. Let nedotsivilizovannye, nedovospitannye and nedoprezentabelnye, but still.

Someone's coming to power with the help of money, and someone on the money with the help of the authorities. From what point to start crawling circle, in the final account it does not matter. The result is all the same.

Economics, money, power...

Jesus Christ, as we remember, they said that you cannot serve God and mammon, that is, wealth (Matt. 6, 24).

The author of this book had some time in parallel to serve and to both. As they say, I declare with all responsibility: indeed, it turns out very badly. More precisely, it is not obtained.

But, nevertheless, always want the impossible, and my Ministry “mammon” to tell. In the end, when all the undoubted cons it gave me a certain financial independence and, more importantly, with invaluable experience - we still live yet in the Kingdom of God, but in the real, imperfect and very cruel world.

Why not share this experience with readers, neighbors on this imperfect world?

 

 

II

 

That human destiny is subject to huge number of accidents, it is difficult to challenge, of course, if not to count God's predestination, or “working out of karma.

And at the age of seventeen, when one finishes school and before it raises the question of choosing a profession, his destiny is usually determined absolutely continuous chain of unpredictable events. There are, of course, the lucky ones who choose their life path already at the age of fourteen (for example, Andrei Voznesensky, if his memoirs true), but not many. I personally such 't seen himself certainly was not.

No, I am in high school knew I wanted to study to be a literary critic. Stress is not on the artist, and literary critic, because the way in the Surikov Institute was closed due to me uniquely complete unorthodoxy of my paintings, and there was not a military Department.

So I was going to enter the faculty of Philology of Moscow state University, but we realised that if his nationality even by some miracle there will go after the Institute for many years waiting for me the fate of the editor or librarian. Similar situation was with other humanitarian faculties of the University. In the yard, it was in 1981!

Any elite Institute of international relations, foreign languages and other such) for me, for the same reasons, the national was absolutely unreal, and I'm about them never even thought of.

No, and in Soviet times almost everywhere could do for a bribe of several thousand roubles, but in our family and hundreds of never happened.

In short, I surprisingly easily yielded to pressure parents, who believed that a child needs a practical education. And in those days it was synonymous with technical.

Funny how much has changed since the specificity of professions! Now practical education is Economics, Finance, law, but certainly not a science and technics. What is now the famous Phystechthat Baumanskaya? Probably the same thing with ballistic missiles and submarines - quietly rusting and falling apart, while still trying to pretend that they are the best in the world.

Frankly, when I resigned to not receive humanitarian education, I was all the same, what to get technical. I am satisfied with any degree, in the future, not burdening the secrecy and the compulsory years of practice in some horrible institution such as the Kurchatov Institute. Let our “vigorous” bombs and anti-aircraft missile systems then were really the best in the world (by the way, still don't believe it), their development I do not gathered is still upbringing was not that...

Another “limitation” was put in the form of the need for the Institute of military Department, for fighting in Afghanistan or to clean his boots with a toothbrush demob I was not going well. A military Department was given, except nobody wants the rank of Lieutenant, savingreservation” (exemption from active military service).

Again I was lucky: in the mid-eighties “reservation” with all the universities for several years was removed, and all students born in the late sixties, “rattled” in the army. But I have managed to get military training, and possibly to graduate (don't remember). Importantly, in the army, I did not get and the “bloodless” I wear the rank of Lieutenant road forces, and specialty have very exotic - military-bridge work. What bridge I'm able to build, I think, understands even the military enlistment office, if never (PAH-PAH, touch wood) has not sent me any agenda to any fees and retraining.

 

 

III

 

This military profession means that I finally entered the Moscow automobile and road Institute, abbreviated MADI. Close to home - I lived on the River Station, MADI hotel is near the metro station “Airport”. Many people know this grandiose Stalinist building with a colonnade overlooking the Leningrad prospectus.

My arrival, as I said, came under pressure grandmothers and mothers. How still I was, on what faculty to study, said that at first I was going to come on... road transport (at).

I prevented the saving chance - registration in the Institute's dispensary so-called “form 086” - information from the clinic (not sure how now, but then it upon admission to the College was required). The doctor, seeing in it the word “allergic”, wrote that I was fit only for two of the eight faculty, not on road - there seems to be hands all the time must be in butter... Mysterious idiocy, although probably relying on some instructions.

I even first upset, but then decided to enter the “allowed” specialty “Automated control systems” (ACS), the benefit of the certificate I had a “pjaterochki”, I took only two entrance exams and contest my little concern. Indeed, the examination I was passed and on this specialty has received.

What would happen if I went on the road Department - don't know, but it could be very wrong. The matter is that at ASU, I found a very intelligent company - many Jews, which was closed path in the Moscow state University, went to Moscow on the same principle that I am. We even have interpreted the name of the University as “the Moscow Association of the children of Israel.”

They say that the same “Jewish” was engineering (Institute of transport engineers).

Inside MADI Jewish brothers, of course, went on the most “clean” faculties, that is, ACS, “Hydropneumoautomatic” (all robots), economic and other similar. On “road” Jews practically was not, and was a rough male company, which heals and unsociable intellectual, which I was in the beginning of the first course, there was nothing to do.

However, the “feeble intellectual” has to say: obviously, at this time I finally began age hormonal changes, which is under the continuous “pumping up” the muscles to the second or third course made me quite healthy person. I speak from a school costume - for lack of poverty other clothes I wore it until the second year, and then he suddenly I was disastrously low.

Fortunately, my mother brought from Germany jeans and sweater, and I have walked in the second year and several subsequent. I had denim jacket especially for the exams, with sewn-on inner pockets for “Cribs”.

And my mother brought from the same black jacket leather band. Naturally, the “second hand”. It pre-tabbing similar internal pockets for “cheat sheets” and wearing a large badge district Komsomol conference, I handed the socio-political subjects such as “scientific communism”. Operated smoothly (in this dress, I was like a young Commissioner twenties), but still remember with horror the summer session - sit me in a suit of cheap celluloid imitation leather in the thirty-degree heat... Invspominaetsya Yevtushenko:

 

...I'm in the devil's skin” went

hell if the heir

Leg any rattling when frost

the frozen drainpipe,

And “devil's skin” to my rooted,

and not got out,

And in fights rescued

range of vertebrates,

indefinite.

 

As for my traditional of moreobsolete, by making the necessary conclusions from the school days, I tried to be “social”as he could. On a speciality ACS for eighteen-year-old boy it was not the most unpleasant duty in the group the majority of the students were female, and for the Soviet male students poverty in no case was no blemish, and like the girls did not interfere. At parties (if they, in my opinion, is not called the “meetings”) was dominated by the principle of doubling, were all equal, and we all had fun, danced, loved, quarreled, tolerated...

 

 

IV

 

Certain social tension within the stream became apparent later, during my senior year, when there were “careerists” (including, unfortunately, and I), which, as is known, the other members of the society do not like and do not miss a chance, at least, “pin up”, and as a maximum, to foul.

Generally speaking, the process of social career (in fact, as we said, this is one of the forms of business) reminds me of multilevel computer games-the Walker”: at each new level the ambitious filth new people in a new way, as a result of its activities is as ephemeral and leaves the same feeling of emptiness, as the final congratulations on the screen, followed by the words “Game over”...

But, frankly, this process has some fascinating, and I am ill seriously. For me it began with yet another chance, and who could have imagined...

It all began with the fact that literally the first and second of September in the first year was the first lesson of physical education. All faculty gathered in the Assembly hall, so give a lecture on the benefits of physical training and the need for universal norms of putting the TRP. For the generation that grew up without this insanity, decode: “Ready for labor and defense”. The so-called set of “achievements” in the sport, which, in theory, every Soviet citizen was obliged to perform: so many times to press, run stometrovku for so many seconds...

After this lecture, each group is invited to elect from among its members fizorga that he collected dues to the mysterious “Voluntary sports society “Burevestnik”. This, in fact, duties fizorga ended. That is why, when one of the students (we have not even had time to each other to know) proposed to elect fizorgom “there's this tall young man,” I did not argue, and was elected.

After eternal lagging behind in school physical education classes all for me it was very funny, but I note that of the extremely small number of males in my group I was most suited for this role - dumbbells gradually made itself felt...

So, I began fizorgom and happily forgot about it.

The first course, first session... I was really needs increased ten rubles scholarship, so I passed all examinations for all five. In the second session I had already started to work “excellent” record-book (I'm not ashamed to show her teachers), and an extra ten rubles per month extra and were not at all subsequent courses.

Well, on what items in MADI had to pass - I think if I studied, for example, Mendeleev, I would treat them the same way. A kind of abstraction. And if “Mathematical analysis” was mysterious and abstract in nature, then any object type “Theoretical foundations of electrical engineering” or nightmarish “Theory of machines and mechanisms” just poorly taught. If desired, with examples from life and fiery speeches, a good teacher could something inspire students.

Although Physics... read beautifully, “wandering star” - worked as Professor-nuclear, but I'm from just a two-year course only remembered himself, and it is probably due to the fact that he for all his erudition spoke with Ukrainian prononca and spoke variable “Gamma” as “Hamm”that was very funny.

Perhaps it is simply impossible to obtain real knowledge of the Institute's comprehensive system, when in session mountain pass a variety of tests and examinations, and all the rest of the time doing their business. There were, of course, individuals who walked to all the lectures, but not more than two or three per group. I to those not treated.

The very word “surrender” is not a synonym for the word “teach”. I think the vast majority of students (including, and in modern paid training) reaches to use spurs ' (Cribs) and “bombs” (pre-written answers to questions) sleight of hand, quite comparable with David Copperfield, and not Dickensian, and famous magician. You've got to seize the moment when the teacher turned around, and not much to squint when copying, and hide all the time...

Most people even in old age with tenderness remembers his student years - freedom, doing what is not known, small children at home not cry, girls sea, in the evening, the wife will not ask where he was... of Course after the Institute man usually gets married, frageda and plows, and if he treats his work and his family as an unpleasant duty, he is fit to feel nostalgic for the windy and a bit empty youth.

Think of the tone of the last paragraph, it is clear that personally I have never missed HEI.

We will not, however, throw in College too large stones. This whole process, at first glance useless, gives certain flexibility of mind and the ability to quickly navigate to any stream of information. And that bad, though hardly justified spending a five-year life, if, of course, not to engage in parallel with anything else.

 

 

V

 

Doing it right. Another accident, has sent me in the direction of active social activities took place between the first and second year and was rather comical.

The fact that our physical education teacher though he was the sweetest man, but sober, we rarely saw him. Once we were running a hundred yards, at the stadium it was aterials the stakes, the teacher drunk confused post, shortened the distance, and we ran somewhere between the world and Olympic record. It was written in a kind of statement, someone at the Department of physical education saw, and eventually I was invited to take part in regional competitions (it's good that no country-wide).

I thought at these competitions will last resort, but how strange, the race was only the fourth of five. Someone was even worse - apparently, his teacher too confused post...

At regional competitions, I met with the so-called “assistant Dean for sport” of his Department, and he seemed, for want of a better candidate offered me to become the “Chairman sportsoveta faculty. I agreed, bearing in mind that when fizorgom group never seen any President sportsoveta. Just at this time, I began a romantic interest in your personal life, and I didn't care what nonexistent sportsoveta to lead.

Frankly, I even fizorgov never gathered. In justification will say that I no “gathering” - and in fact, except the assistant Dean for sport, I obeyed, and responsible for sportrabotu in the Institute's Komsomol Committee. And I had to work closely with responsible for the same sportrabotu the Komsomol Bureau of the faculty, but I was not even acquainted with him.

But - first love, first sorrow, walks under the moon and stuff like that. No, for twenty-year-old boy is also necessary, and some contempt tone caused only by the fact that we are talking about business, and he, unfortunately, leaves very little room for love and walks under the moon...

So I lived until the end of the second year, while from afar could see that fried cock that I was going through a couple of years to pick them. So convoluted, I said “distribution of young specialists”.

The echo of Stalin's slave-owning system was under a certain economic rationale: the government has spent money on your teaching and scholarship, so you be good, fulfil three years where the birthplace of the commands, and then - do what you want.

I happened to be passing the lists posted on the distribution of “senior comrades” and saw a list of potential jobs. ZIL plant “Energomash”, all sorts of “regime enterprise” and other unpleasant places.

As I had not thought -- not understand! Three years to stand for Kuhlmann or mortgage punched in a computer somewhere on the ZIL or, at best, in the Central research Institute of Complex Automation - it was somehow not for me.

I remember that I fell into a hysterical state, and just wanted to leave the Institute, even at the price of service in the army - the military conscription is not asleep and was taken away immediately.

Then I realized that I have a chance - so-called science, i.e. the distribution of any Department of the Institute. But for this it was necessary to make acquaintance at the leadership Institute, than to help me no one except myself.

And then I at the end of the second course joined the Institute's Committee of Komsomol and asked me why, Chairman sportsoveta faculty, nobody asks about work, not calls to meetings and generally does not feel “active member of the Komsomol”.

It turned out that sport in the Komsomol Committee said the fifth-year missing in connection with the work on diploma projects, and I was immediately invited to the new school year this sector lead. I agree on this with all other thoughts than in the previous steps of a career, because I knew that I really need.

I was there and then “hang” the preparation of the report and election conference Komsomol Institute. Naturally, not all, and importation of the Institute of suitable size bust of Lenin, for existed was too small for such an outstanding event. I mobilized for this multiple fizorgov, and we were carrying a bust of the Palace of culture named after Chkalov (now there is a casino, and I still drive past him with a smile). A bus was commissioned, but Lenin did not get through the door, and the next day was commissioned by a truck. We, swearing, pulling a huge bust for a smooth ears, and he wished that they are not made in the form of pens...

So, in the fall of 1983, at the beginning of the third course, I Institute a reporting and election conference of the Komsomol was “democratically” (of course, unanimously elected to the Komsomol Committee MADI responsible for sport and mass work. In the Komsomol organization of the Institute was ten thousand members of the Komsomol Committee was on the rights of the district Committee, so this was a no, but the appointed office.

Could I, eternal dissident, to imagine something like that? But it was all better than in three years “up to” sit in “mailbox”.

I fear that the generation that grew up in the late nineties, will have to explain what a “mailbox” and why I was so afraid of him.

Very well - so-called private enterprise that made any secret paramilitary products. Proper names such as “quantum” or “Glavspecmontazhstrojj” these offices were too, but outsiders they were not supposed to know, so in the workbook, and a mailing address, they appear as, for example, “P/I ¹ 12345-67”.

They differed very strict regime, even the pass had been issued at his hands, so that in case of loss have not got spies. When entering (exiting) the officer pressed the button with your personnel number, spacing automatically dropped out of the rack into the hand of the watchman, he checked the photograph, and pressed the pedal to “turnstile” turned and employee missed. In parallel logon time (output) was recorded by the personnel Department.

In some of these establishments monitored and release of the Department, for example, for lunch. They say, somewhere in the toilet we had to ask for leave from the head.

For all this, however, employees pay a higher salary (engineers - an average of 200-250 rubles a month against 150-180 in the “unclassified” area, plus frequent and considerable premium). But what is at factories of nuclear waste were paid fifteen thousand, but not for nothing that money was called “coffin”...

In short, the “N/I” I did not like the Komsomol, and preferred to work with long-term view on the chair.

 

 

VI

 

Official phrase of the time “the Komsomol - the party faithful assistant” was under a very real basis. The party ruled the state, and the Komsomol was her school of young specialists. Of course, I'm talking about the same level of Komsomol organizations, where was a no activity, because the Communists were almost all citizens of the USSR at the age from 14 to 28 years, but not all of them then something ruled.

It cannot be said that the Institute's Committee of Komsomol led to a real and constant work - did the rector's office, Dean's offices and departments. But the power of the Komsomol Committee was, and least - he was the conductor of the party's General line in the Soviet youth”. Then there is some punitive-stabilizing role in the student's environment plus “Soviet” window dressing on the walls should hang wall Newspapers and slogans guilty of drinking alcohol and Smoking in prohibited areas should approximately be punished, and there must be all sorts of rallies and sporting events.

The latter was just in my competence and, I must say, on the third-fourth years I coped with it well. My task was to organize their own events (equipment, facilities, etc.) and to “ensure the attendance,” because the vast majority of measures few people interested. So I gave faculty of the Komsomol Bureau “quota”, how many people should be, and where. Was considered a success if the “quota” was performed forty percent.

There were, however, exceptions to that voluntarily gathered really a lot of people - meeting with the chess grandmastertal, Semantic and other) or “sports events” followed by disco.

Disco those years... They knowingly used to attract students to the Komsomol activities. The people they were full, since by “ideological harm” in most of the Soviet institutions they were extremely rare - not more than once in a month or two, and the program were approved in the cultural Department of the district Committee of Komsomol, where it was checked with the listof non-recommended products”. In this “black list”, as I remember, were ensembles “Kiss”, “AndC-DC”, “Genghis Khan”, and also lots of other, unknown to me - I even classical music has always been weak, and only in the modern - the more...

Yes, and still were the so-called “antipatharia activities” - for the young people at Easter did not go to Church at night on TV shows good movies and all sorts of places were coveted disco. However, the Church in advance encircle, and they were allowed by invitations only. A program discos still approved by the district committees with the cancellation of “ideologically harmful” groups.

Kiss” for the last two letters, reminiscent of the SS symbols, the party specifically told not to love. I can even remember, we excluded from the Komsomol of a guy wearing the badge with this logo! Even if the person is nothing on the chest were not, he could roll a reprimand, and then instead of the red banner with a portrait of the beloved leader - “alien symbols”, that is a terribly bad emblem of Western ensemble...

The young man is not very lucky - he was hit by another idiotic campaign for across-the wearing of Komsomol badges, and the YCL group - apparently, personal foe - his “passed”.

And I'm at this meeting also voted “for” a penny, in for a pound. That is called himself member of the Komsomol Committee - voice, preferably the same, he would vote for leadership. The latter, however, was desirable, but not always necessary, because a number of “internal” issues of their own opinions were allowed and even encouraged by the measure.

I must say that the leadership that it was desirable to Orient the vote. There were two of them: the Secretary (same as Chairman) of the Komsomol Committee Vladimir Solomatin and his Deputy on ideological and educational work of Sergey Tsarev. These were the so-called “liberated Komsomol workers”, that is, receiving a salary from the district Committee and going to work “from and up to”.

Solomatin was thirty careerist Institute of scale, and Tsarev, which I immediately obeyed, is much higher. If the first “hatched” Komsomol appointed Professor of some Department and soon took on a teaching job, Tsarev, son largest of partbase, went to a classical nomenclature line of those years: Deputy Secretary of the Institute's Komsomol Committee head of Department of Moscow Komsomol - the first Secretary of the Frunze district Committee of Komsomol (the area was MADI).

Then came capitalism, and if anyone does it disappeared, so it's secretaries of Komsomol district committees: the party after the August coup, the property was taken (at least that part, which could reach), and the Komsomol - no! And partbase the money that did not manage to transfer abroad, hidden in “faithful assistant party - Komsomol. For example, the famous Bank MENATEP was created on the basis of precisely the Frunze district Committee, and the Tsar took the last place in the Board of Directors of the Bank.

When many years later, in 1995, the firm, where I was co-owner, was left without banking services (as I'll show later), I landed in Tsarevo MENATEP visit with the offer of cooperation, but failed to become again in the position of “the boy” I did not want, and other conditions of work with such a man, Sergey, could not be.

However, for the Komsomol times I Tsarevo very grateful. He is older than me by only three or four years, but I was nineteen, he is twenty-three and it was incomparably greater experience. Moreover, specific - how to hold yourself at the negotiations, what can, and cannot, how to communicate with the Institute bosses as to a competitor of the type of trade Union (somehow between the trade Union Committee and the Committee of the Komsomol was quiet hostility)...

“School” I was this hard, clever, not for years developed and in men arrogant man, as a boy. However, as a kid I was. And I think I was lucky that I had two years to work with Tsarevo.

His “science” was as effective as the lessons with avtoinstruktorom (driving license, I took about the same time), who hated the whole world, unimaginable yelling, swearing, and every time my mistake threatened to punch the face. But for some reason then I took the exam in the SAI without any problems, and since then I no never rebuked in bad driving...

 

 

VII

 

All members of the Komsomol Committee was fifteen, and each had his “sector”, every Thursday evening we met, discussed some matters, informed about upcoming events, someone in the Komsomol took, someone ruled...

The latter is most often occurred in the “cart” from the police when the student (student) someone killed, robbed, etc. Came to the sobering-up station for the first time usually only a “severe reprimand to be placed in your card member of the Komsomol, but for the second time and could be deleted.

Usually the Komsomol Committee at the exception of the Komsomol “petitioned” in front of the rector to expel MADI, and people almost automatically flew out of the Institute that in Soviet times meant “the wolf ticket” for the rest of your life, and for young men of military age have two years of the Soviet army together with “hazing” and the war in Afghanistan. By the way, that guy with the emblem of “Kiss” still, “sorry” and excluded from the Institute did not, and in fact I could “intercede”...

In short, unattractive in the Soviet political system, the Committee of the Komsomol was a real force and even its “voting machine”, ordinary members like me, enjoyed the Institute certain weight, paired with a well-deserved dislike.

But free time this work leaves little while made it possible to formally walk any lectures and even “Holy of holies” - courses for military training. And then after two of unauthorized absence Dean expelled from the Institute! However, they all had friends everywhere, and some of the superintendent did not notice the gaps, some fellow doctors did a dummy of certificate... Nabout wag officially “on the post - this opportunity was not enough for anyone, and it was another subject of envy and intrigue.

It intrigues - who openly speak against a member of the Komsomol Committee? But a lot of blood was corrupted, as I'll show later.

 

 

VIII

 

We got away from the topic of sports-mass work. Show me organized pompous military-sports game “Crew”. My generation will remember as on TV one time something was going on Vysotsky:

 

...And here's favorite - “come on, guys!”

Shoot, jump - crazy!

 

So, every such game was held at a suburban polygon MADI (under Zelenograd) in the Institute level. Were engaged in a military Department, the administration, DOSAAF (mysterious, but the rich “Volunteer society for assistance to army, aviation and Navy) and others, and I for organizing all of this got another “Certificate of merit. These letters are gradually accumulated so many that I wish could have them glued not only the toilet, but the whole apartment, if it was me then.

No cash awards in the Soviet “social work” (in any case, Komsomol) the speech was not. Apparently, it was considered that for the sake of social career, people have to sacrifice short-term profits.

Indeed, to me personally, this work gave much more than dense glossy paper with portraits of Lenin and ornamental flourishes. And even more than any speculative premium. And even more than experience, very useful at age twenty.

Komsomol work provided the very relationships that could solve something in my life at the upcoming distribution.

Not all was, of course, smooth. For example, in the fourth year was the story of the “potato” - the first serious intrigue, which gave me the opportunity to understand that detractors any person who wants something in this life to achieve, much more than the well-wishers without the prefix “non”.

Afraid (actually or rather hope)that the next generation will have to explain the term “potato”. The so-called autumn “export” of citizens to help in the harvest in peri-urban farms and state farms. How effective has this support - do not have data, but for students, this meant a couple of months, unsanitary living conditions, digging in the dirt and continuous drinking.

Note that in the seventies on “potato” must be taken out and innocent employees of any Soviet institutions. But in the mid-eighties it was only a portion of regime “mailbox”unfortunate soldiers and somewhat less unfortunate students. However, in different regions was different, but we are talking about Moscow.

Students MADI was lucky - “potato” was only one time for all time of training at the beginning of the fourth year, and most universities drove their students every year...

For a person with normal health of the special problems of “potato” was not even perceived as not very pleasant, but the rest. I'm the same with my neurodermatitis (still almost can't work gloves - inflammation of the hands), and increased susceptibility to colds and stomach diseases there was nothing to do.

And I got a certificate in the clinic that for health reasons me agricultural work contraindicated. I don't remember, but some sort of formality I had accomplished something does not signed the Dean release, whether not assured help in the Institute's clinic.

All I would have gotten away with, but “as a youth, foolishly, I decided first of September hold on “potato” his Institute's group! Also with me in the group studied girlfriend, she was unable to free themselves, and it also had to follow. And I was just out of Odessa, healthy and tanned, and it was hard to tell what work I contraindicated.

It is not surprising that a few guys from parallel group obtainability and dashed off to the Dean's denunciation that I antillectual type who refuse to develop Soviet agriculture. When I found out that I have something somewhere is not assured, but not assured, it turns out that anyone - all in the struggle for harvest! So I turned persistent truants, and for this to “ask” from the Institute, and there is no perfect study would not have helped.

Thanks Committee of the Komsomol! Tsarev me obmateril from head to toe, but the Dean's office was immediately written a letter with a request to replace me “potato” work in the Komsomol Committee, as a valuable frame, extremely necessary for the organization of military-sport games “Crew” (it was held just in autumn). In short, all ended well, and eventually I was one of the few Soviet students, and not pokopavshis in Moscow autumn mud.

However, the “friends” of the parallel group again made itself felt, but for small things.

The funny thing is that I have deservedly earned the nickname “hack writers” - I had on the sports topics continuously write cheerful little articles in the Institute's newspaper-newspaper. His works in this hard body with a remarkable title “For the auto-road footage, as well as letters, I could have pasted the entire toilet. Better fate, these articles do not deserve, but, after all, this was my first experience in journalism, even small-scale and censored-Soviet. So, unfortunately, has written the vast majority...

 

 

IX

 

And I have a third-year trip to Hungary. Called it “exchange groups Komsomol”and drove the three of us: myself, Deputy Secretary of the Komsomol Committee on “ideology” Sergey Tsarev and Deputy Secretary on “labor Affairs Viktor Taranovsky.

Again have to explain: the Secretary for labour Affairs was responsible for the formation of student construction teams, that is, taking orders from the construction sites for cheap labor and to decide, whom to send many students. Note that it in his “diocese” really cool a lot of money - wages, the students went through the “staff labor Affairs”. Taranovsky was older than me, and Tsarev, he was 25-26 years old, and he was very “progeny” economic Manager - what a Soviet type a La mayor Luzhkov.

Trips abroad, even in a socialist country demanded the passage of the set of “permissive” courts until the Institute party Committee and district Committee of the Commission. However, to us, Komsomol workers, not quibble, and asked a formal questions. I do not remember what it means light.

And individual interviews at the district Committee with the plain and elusive (as intended) and representative of the KGB, too, do not remember - some General remarks about the need to behave with dignity Soviet citizen...

Then we in the city OVIR received the passport, defended the relatively small queue for train tickets and changed the Vneshtorgbank rubles on the Hungarian Forint.

The latter requires special comment. The dollar since the Stalinist era officially worth about 60 cents. Naturally, this course had nothing to do with economic realities, and on the black market for the dollar gave about three rubles.

Every Soviet citizen, received permission to travel abroad, had the right to exchange, if I am not mistaken, three hundred roubles, but at the inflated official exchange rate, that is to export about $ 400. It seems to be beneficial, but when you consider that the exchange rate in socialist countries was such as excessive, this benefit at the check-out in socialist countries disappeared.

This course was undoubtedly a very interesting when going to the “rotten West”, but students are not allowed there, except for “privileged” universities. It's funny how the importance of then “elite” talked about the trips to the West “mere mortals! And yet this importance is very contagious - even well educated young men and women, “accounted worthy” to go to London or Paris, with stories about these Martian unattainable cities glassy eyes, and those acquired haughty, stately expression...

Well, God is with them, the elite travel and favorable exchange rates. First, about this time I really thought, and secondly, in the socialist countries is also possible was to see something new, and buy something about “decent”. Exchanged three hundred rubles, or enough to get dressed from head to foot, or on relatively modern audio system. Since the Soviet people and bought either / or.

And from the Soviet Union could take out two large bottles of vodka per person. Not only gifts, but also for a drink - abroad Soviet people get drunk.

We, unfortunately, exceptions were not. Especially Taranovsky, which is not surprising - it was one of the components of the image of the Soviet economic planner. When, sorry, its a booze vomited on the train Gyor - Budapest, we Tsarevo, being with equal “hangover”, found nothing better than to stick his head out the window. Hungarian respectable gentlemen “knowingly” looked at this shame, and then rushed to close the window, because (again, sorry) the contents of the stomach Mr. Taranov in the course of a train in the window flew...

My God, how it was disgusting! And not only that. In Budapest, the streets went the Soviet military patrols and hungry and brutal “Rus tourists, obliko moral”. Yes, hungry. Indeed, as Galic said Klim Kolomytsev - “Though crappy, but all the same currency! Still, spending only a pity!”

So the funny thing is that in Budapest, and we still have not accepted! First, we happily spent a few days in the small town of Gyor, where the “negotiated” with the Committee of the Komsomol local transport Institute. Then we got tired, we decided to go for the remaining three days in Budapest. Tsarev more from Moscow with someone at the Budapest University of call up, got a noncommittal reply, but we all decided to take a chance.

By the way, a great deal of freedom (by Soviet standards) was at our “group of Komsomol workers! Few of the “Rus touristic” could afford to just take yourself to go for a few days in the city specified in the route only as a transit...

But it turned out that people in Budapest, which Tsarev talked, went somewhere, and some even rank in the local Komsomol Committee openly sent us... we know where. Like this, a contract between the University and your MADI not, and means to say nothing. In the eyes of the Hungarian master shone such a hatred of the Soviet occupation (however, rightly)that we did not continue the conversation.

We spent the night in the Soviet military commandant's office on chairs (one of the handy bottle of vodka, which Taranovsky gave a duty officer). The next day we called the Soviet Embassy, complained that three of the Komsomol worker “homeless”, and the reaction was immediate: for we have come, lived in a decent hotel (free!) and even apologized for “irresponsible Hungarian comrades”. There was almost nothing (brought food over another in Gyor, and spending on food Forint was sorry), but the youth, youth - a “hot dog” in the day, and nothing...

But and bought fashionable clothes, and looked Budapest. Three hungry, tired, angry, unshaven, half-drunken man.

So in Soviet times, and went on foreign trips.

In 1986, just after graduating from College, I went to ' international crew “in Varna. Two weeks we worked on the project, and two weeks traveled around the country. Now, given the bitter experience we have with so many of canned food, that would be enough for a couple of months fully Autonomous existence. But as we pulled in Bulgaria these mountains of boxes - laughter!

However, Bulgaria is not in Canada, where “bratushek”, i.e. Russian, more or less loved, and the atmosphere was much nicer. But buy and it was almost nothing - for the standard of living in Bulgaria is not far removed from the USSR. This, however, was for the best, although relatively quietly watched the country.

I, for example, in Varna sat alone in the intercity bus and ride to the neighboring cities. In particular, a trip to the ancient capital of Bulgaria - Preslav. For me, the commander of the crew for such “impudence” looked askance, but preferred not to interfere - I was then still a member of the Institute's Komsomol Committee, and also had a duty to watch, “as if something happens”. Including behind the commander.

So all one after the other and watched. Napoleon, as you know, put a spy to his Minister of police Fouche, and then started a group of spies, that they watched the spies, put to Fouche...

Yes, but I still bought in Bulgaria a lot of books! No, no, not self-published - it was the socialist countries? And not in the Bulgarian language, but it is “our”, published by Soviet publishing houses!

In the USSR the book type the three-volume edition of the ascension immediately on leaving became a bibliographic rarity, as part of the edition, sent by a mysterious “cultural exchange” in the “fraternal countries”, they sold out much slower and the prey of Soviet tourists. Just wanted to know, where are the Russian-language book stores. But the information is passed from mouth to mouth”, so I brought from Sofia with a backpack full of books. I remember, for example, “the Life of remarkable people”, dedicated to Vladimir Monomakh, in Moscow and that was not there.

But what crowd was in the Russian-speaking shop! It seemed that in Bulgaria Russian tourists just a wild amount of...

And finally, another funny thing: in 1986 plagued Gorbachev “dry law”, and drinks were taken not from the USSR, and the USSR. And we brought from Bulgaria, the same two “standard” bottle per person...

 

 

X

 

In the middle of the fourth year on the job on some of the items, which led the Department of Applied mathematics, the teacher came up to me and asked to come to the Department to Professor Ephraim. The last in the near future was not only my supervisor, but also a person who had a tremendous impact on me and prompted new treat human relationships.

But the more closely I became acquainted with Ephraim later, but he told me to do at the Department of “scientific work”. Actually it meant very high (though not wholly) the probability distribution to the Department.

Ephraim before I have never in my life seen (it's on no flow studies are not conducted), and who recommended him to me, still don't know. I think that some of the University administration (Efremov was a member of the set of some of the Institute commissions). Perhaps by the Secretary of the Komsomol Committee Solomatina also met at various commissions. But personally Solomatin with Ephraim me did not say - I specifically said.

Most likely, work a secret Institute a mechanism of selection of personnel.

Indeed, the Commission on the distribution (I like round excellence”, was the first), the statement in front of me had already spelled out the Department of Applied mathematics. Of the fifty people in our flow in MADI was another, and the others went where.

To be fair to say that the Komsomol work after the distribution, i.e. in the second half of the fourth and fifth courses, I almost gave up. Besides Tsarev, “went on the increase”, Solomatin received the title of Professor andwas gamelevel”, so “was sagimbaeva” and I. On the fifth course at me yet, “hung” and military-Patriotic work, my Komsomolskaya title doubled, but the real increase of the amount of work that means.

However, the Soviet student to relax did not give even on the fifth course: if you want a “red diploma”, have not only a minimum of 75% of fives in all subjects, but also if you please take five all state exams and thesis project.

GOST” in English and philosophy, the problem for me was not, but the “war”... Well, poor road from me, Lieutenant troops, I do not know how to boot scraper, why this road machine, have extremely weak, and the main thing - do not have the slightest desire to learn.

But before the exam I went to the head of military Department (I've had a lot of contact within the Komsomol work), recalled its existence, and eventually received the “five” at a very mediocre response (I just remembered the mysterious scraper - he was one of the questions).

However, and without a personal acquaintance with the head of the Department, I think, everything would be fine - military blood was not hungry (fees they we've broken enough) and put five potential to krasnolimanska, and even more responsible for sports and military-Patriotic work in the Komsomol Committee.

Since we remembered fees (per month on the site near Moscow, between the fourth and fifth course), even I will not describe them in prose. Here's a poem that I wrote:

 

The roof of the barracks presses, as the press,

Metal beds pressed to the floor,

And the house was, oddly enough, here

In this forest, semi-captivity.

 

Without it, has no existence,

To him is bound even by color

Dirt, dust, grass and gravel

Our brown-green figures.

 

Those bleak, as the mask

What dilatory shoulder.

And look swollen, evil eye

Not like anything.

 

Yes and we do not want to remember

As we once loved women,

As we ate dinner,his mother,

And in General - our old life.

 

Here,life today crawls

Prorabotal, poluda,

And it seems that you and the third platoon -

The same forever.

 

As tunic, similar thoughts,

Like epaulettes, different words.

For all others - your muscles,

And only for her cap - head.

 

Trample boots riot summer flowers,

And not for us forest beauty.

At any time you're ready to return

These honeycombs.

 

And there - you think long days

Take a minute to build...

His eyes lit evil lights

But over the column - a cheerful song.

 

Simply put, brutalized all these charges enormously. And this is only a month military barrack life, and without the “grandfathers”, and not far from Moscow, and with the long familiar to teachers of the military Department! What is the office in the “real” army? God forbid anyone...

“War,” I passed, but there still remained a “diploma”, and then began the most “fun”.

 

 

XI

 

Profiling my specialty “Automated control systems” was, as expected, the same Department.

A professional programmer, however, there was only one, and the other teachers conducted classes in obsolete electronic database of the computer of the end of the sixties, the basics of building a Union of computing complexes and other uninteresting, and most importantly, absolutely useless for future work things. And, as luck would have it, the most useful of their subjects - preparation of technical tasks and projects - led the most incompetent teacher.

Acting head of the Department Tamara the Minovna Aleksandridi - strong woman of sixty years, participant of the war, was simple, but pleasant. She had an excellent relationship with the Professor of the Department of Applied mathematics, Ephraim, whom I had “scientific work”and, accordingly, she was friendly to me.

However, Ephraim I was a little to solve practical optimization tasks on the computer language Fortran”, that is started at least something to understand why and objectively Ms. Aleksandridi could me feel good about. And when either at the end of the fourth year, either at the beginning of the fifth, distributed managers diploma projects, I have them become personally acting head of the Department of Aleksandridiand consultant - Professor Yefremov. There were no signs of trouble.

But Tamara the Minovna was the candidate of Sciences, and therefore it is not approved head of the Department of ASA, and sent a “complete” doctor of science from the side. Professor of Tisova was also slightly over sixty, and he was also a participant in the war.

To terrorize he got me started on the first lesson in their subject matter (ordinary “basics of building a” hypothetical global computing systems).

What am I, a humble fifth-year, not hit the head of the Department of profiling?

The thing of it was, that Mrs. Aleksandridi not resigned to their dismissal and, apparently, was to take some action against Mr. of Tisova, and I she was in that year only graduate. The failure of the protection diploma is a serious blow thesis supervisor, and Mr. Theis started me bitch is not a joke.

But personally, he also had reason to dislike me - my well-wishers, he was told that I had a nice Oriental name Dilaver the Bilalovich (see, even remembered!) in the circle of sovremennikov abbreviated with “Debilovich”. Yes, and the growth was below me two times, and, calling to the Board at its seminars and laughing in the spirit of Napoleon's phrase: “You are not above me, but longer.”

That spat “Debilovich” on my “pyaterochnuyu” record book and the title of member of the Institute's Komsomol Committee, showed my attempt to join the party. He was a member of the party Bureau of the Department, and Tamara the Minovna - no.

I, unanimously passed many previous (Komsomol and student) courts, at the meeting of the party Bureau was Titovym smeared “the full program” - recalled and proshchannja “potato” (not lazy did he know!), and bad behaviour in lectures (I usually lectures did not go, but if they had, was sitting in the back bench and something drew), and something else, can't remember.

And what will the teachers-members of the party Bureau, when so speaks head of the Department? Naturally, I was in disgrace “riding”.

What do I do in this game has suffered is another question. I have already said that any activity delays, and each new game dictates its own conditions. If so I convinced dissident, “Survilla” and went on Komsomol - no fundamental differences with membership in the Communist party was not. And the yard was in 1985. Who knew that the party remained only six years, and before the mass escape of the ranks of the time was even less...

It is curious that for me, “rolling” on the party Bureau was not a moral blow, on the contrary, I was mobilized and realized that at the graduation project I no longer live, but it will be a really serious. And here I began to struggle.

History, of course, far from a masterpiece of plot Yuri Trifonov, “House on the embankment”. There, as You remember, the fifth-year Glebov becomes a “bargaining chip” in baiting the rectorate his thesis supervisor, Professor of Hanuka, quietly betrays the latter receives a “registered” the scholarship Griboyedov, but it throws a beloved woman is the daughter of the same Professor of Hanuka.

Of course, no financial interest in combating Mr. Titovym I did not pursue, if, of course, do not consider the will to receive “red diploma”is very useful in further emigration of Soviet or even life. Just then I realized that the position and our, and your penny for poplyashem” brings much more damage than the open lesson for anyone. If we are involved in the game (even if not required) - the game.

To go begging to “the Debilovich” was so disgusted that I even didn't think about that. Yes, and would not help.

His role in his dismissal will not exaggerate - apparently involved some serious forces at the level of administration. But Delaware of Bilalovich killed his long tongue. One day he was stupid in one of his lectures to plunge into the reasoning that during the war he allegedly served in the air force and put a great number of Germans, and Tamara the Minovna Aleksandridi was some kind of a nurse, but now enjoys with him the same rights as war participants.

- So what? - will be surprised what a later generation.

- And time-that was what, forgot? Soviet!

 

 

XII

 

Each institution was placed curator of the KGB, and MADI was no exception. Was the name of the curator of Alexey Mikhailovich, and last name was kept in strict secrecy. Was he, as most of these gentlemen, lean and fit nice in communication, with the soft and pleasant voice, and had been some modest closet under the stairs.

He certainly had a secret informants, but all the members of the Komsomol Committee, and I among them, were periodically to him openly called and intelligent question about what happens in the Institute's youth and not identified any intervention by the competent authorities.

I remember the first call I was afraid: what if the “bodies” were interested in my anti-Soviet talks with friends and start to claim “rent” last? But nothing happened, because I was like “its” - Komsomol worker. Discussions were perfectly friendly, no pressure was: nothing anti-Soviet't seen and not heard - and okay. Be, brother, later vigilant and attentive.

All this would be ridiculous, when would not be so sad.

For example, periodically, namely the Jewish holidays, Komsomol activists were obliged to be on duty at the synagogue on the street Arkhipova!

I, like all members of the Komsomol Committee, has sent a senior, but only “group” was about ten, and the composition of the holiday to varied. Our task was to go to the Moscow Komsomol (Bonnet lane), to register there to be instructed, and then to go on the street Arkhipova, the benefit of that near - two lane and... look out there for students of our Institute! And at the end of the holiday had to return to the CIM YCL and record names noticed in a special log.

My duty resulted in the fact that I was allowed to go home subordinates what they were very happy, and went to the synagogue itself, where he met a great company of Jews and of their group and with other departments. Everyone knew, what I “mission”, and laughed a lot. Then I went to the Moscow Komsomol and wrote that students MADI was observed.

The funny thing is that all this to me safely get away with it, as well as anti-Soviet conversation in any company, except, of course, Komsomolsk - there each other still shy, and not all.

Time was even more and the Soviet, but too many cracks gave the system. Until we dokatyvalis, for example, the remnants of the so-called “amoralok, but also not so...

Again the need to explain. “Amoralkami” called “personal matter”under consideration at the party, Komsomol, and trade Union meetings, when his wife wrote a denunciation of her husband that he had to change, and asked him to “take appropriate measures”. This practice was widespread in the fifties and seventies.

Not idiocy ? After all, it happened that after such “amoralok husbands were fired or denied bonuses, the family has remained without money, and miserable informer eventually became even worse.

However, when I was a member of the Komsomol Committee MADI we considered only one Norelco” (letter of the wife of the Secretary of one of the Komsomol Bureau of the faculty), sympathetically has polybles and took note of the information”, that is, no action was taken. But it was “their”, for example, has got in due time the Secretary of one of the Komsomol “, Akburadrunk at the hostel - and lost his job, and all because of him long ago “sharpened teeth” Secretary of the Institute's Komsomol Committee, Mr. Solomatin.

Frankly, in the Komsomol times I had forgotten how to feel remorse, voting “for” or “against”: the game was ugly from the beginning, but since it got so already anyway. As a famous Soviet joke:

“Winter. Moroz. Was flying Sparrow, froze and fell, but got a warm cow dung. Gradually warmed up and chirped. Past was a cat, heard, pulled Sparrow and ate. Morals: not that enemy who you shit planted, not the one who you out of shit pulled out, sitting in the warmth, so be quiet!”

And lived. I am not alone, though it is certainly not an excuse.

Does not justify me that the Komsomol Committee, I often used to help a friend. For example, when my then friend Sergey Pestov, driving past an abandoned farm fields, picked up on it cabbage, was detained for it by the police, and the Institute came “cart”, - I have done everything I can to Serezha from the Komsomol and the Institute has not taken off. He is, thank God, went out and got away with “severe reprimand to be placed in your card”.

And I... Ohnd, as will now boast of good deeds! No, let in the light understand what I've done more good or bad, and what can be attributed my part in exile from MADI head of the Department of automated management systems, Mr. Tisova.

To complain anywhere it was useless, but then it occurred to me to use in the struggle against Mr. of Tisova curator of the KGB. And at one of the meetings with the last I spoke about the very same lecture, where “Debilovich” was considered with Ms. Aleksandridiwho have actively participated in the war.

Soon Mr. of Tisova of the Institute was fired. When dismissing him, among other things, was charged, that he brings to the student audience vnutriepetelialnaya problems, and even disrespectful speaks about the participants of the war.

I then under the leadership of new head of the Department, Tamara of Mirovni Aleksandridi, without problems defended his diploma project and safely was accepted on a post of engineer of the Department of Applied mathematics “native” MADI, in parallel to begin work on the dissertation under the guidance of Alexander Efremov. Was it in 1986.

 

Chapter 7. “Scientific career”

 

© Sergey Zagraevsky

Introduction

Chapter 1. “Soviet burgers”

Chapter 2. Vorkuta

Chapter 3. Sixties

Chapter 4: “Stagnation”

Chapter 5. Psychoanalysis

Chapter 6. Lenin, Party, Komsomol

Chapter 7. “Scientific career”

Chapter 8. Euphoria of epochs changing

Chapter 9. Arkady

Chapter 10. Commerce

Chapter 11. The loss of the bank

Chapter 12. Christianity

Illustrations

 

To the page “Memoirs”

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